Thursday, July 24, 2008

It started so beautifully. This day felt perfect before 6 am.
"It feels like Christmas," I mumbled, still asleep when Preston told me that I wouldn't have to drive him to work. By drive him to work I mean, drag my two sleeping boys out of their beds, load them into a van that will unfortunately still be hot - even at 6am, and spend and hour in the car listening to their moans. And that news really did feel like Christmas. I was overjoyed. 10 months of sharing a car will help you enjoy the simpler things in life.
Twenty minutes later I was woken again, this time by Ethan, not ideal - I was still hoping for another hour of sleep but the joy, the elation of being relived of my chauffeur duties wasn't going to be shaken. This was going to be a good day!! "Momma, something magical has happened." He pulled me to the front door, opened it slowly as if trying to keep me in suspense as along as possible, and stood proudly next to the gift from the "fairies." Decorated in beautiful crayon stars and rainbows sat a brown cardboard box. Inside was the 25 cent necklace Ethan had bought from a vending a machine last night. "Can you believe this momma? The fairies brought you a present!" I looked down at his little freckled nose scrunched and wrinkled as he smiled at me and knew - This is going to be an awesome day.
I ran back to my bed, laughing at the sweetness of my 5 year old and hoping for a few more minutes of peace before Tyler woke up. I cuddled up with a book so grateful to be reading and not driving. The minutes joyfully passed confirming what I knew - This was going to be such a great day.

DUM DUM DUM (Cue the scary music) Boy was I wrong. I didn't knock on wood... this is basic stuff here - when a day starts this heavenly, this bliss can't last....You must knock on wood. I didn't...and believe me I paid dearly!

So back to the story. Picture this - I'm cuddled up in bed reading, joy emanating from my face and in comes Ty. He's naked and covered, and by covered I mean literally every inch of his body, his hair, tummy, ears, legs, you name it - was covered in...I feel pretty gross typing it out for the world to read. Can you guess? OK this stinks and I mean that literally, but I can handle this, I have pioneer blood coursing through my veins, so into the bathtub he went. But my horror had just begun. In Tyler's room I found "you know what" on his sheets, comforter, dresser, pillows and pillowcases, carpet, and soaked into his mattress...I seriously doubt that room will ever be the same. I'm now up to my neck in "you know what" and starting to wonder if it wouldn't have been better to drive Preston to work after all. I encouraged myself to keep scrubbing, dry heaving and disinfecting with these motto's, "They will rise up and call me blessed... No other success can compensate for failure... There is beauty all around...The highest and noblest calling..." Unfortunately the dry heaving and gagging prevented those quotes from bringing much comfort to my violated senses.
We've got our fingers crossed for a good day tomorrow!


Emily said...

I totally feel your pain. Congrats on making it through. So, he smeared it all over your beautifully painted room???

lizS said...

oh my goodness! i've never had that experience with that particular yuck, just with the stuff that comes out the other end. i've been up to my elbows in that way to often. my mom tells a story about a friend of hers who put the baby (nine months or something) down for his nap, and about twenty minutes later heard him playing, went to check on him, and yup, you guessed it! you're exact experience. it was all over him, the crib, the walls, everything. so she throws him in the tub, and he's just screaming his head off the whole time. she cleans him, then cleans his room, and still, he's yelling bloody murder all the while. finally, she gets his room clean, gets him, via much rocking and singing and story telling, to fall back to sleep, and puts him in his crib, when his hands finally relax open, and to her dismay she finds that she missed a spot. yep, his hands were clenched during the whole cleaning and bathing process, and right in the middle of them was yet another present for his mom!
if i were you, i would totally go out for ice cream when my hubby got home.

~Hartwig Family~ said...

Don't you just love those days? I totally understand what you mean. Been there and those days are not fun. Congrats on the room though. Your wall looks fabulous! You are going to have to give me some pointers. Have fun cooking in the Elephant!

Blaine & Angie Hamblin said...

You have such a knack for writing. That is hilarious! Not for you of course, but I feel your pain. Hopefully you can look back on this experience and laugh. (through your dry heaving)

The Thompsons said...

That stinks:)!!! I'm glad you at least enjoyed your early morning!! I love that the fairies came to visit cute!

bensey said...

just reading it made me dry heave & reach for the trash can. isn't it fun when the poop fairy comes to visit? sorry, hope your day gets better!

Sha said...

NO! Not in their cute room! Hope "it" all came out. Have you heard of the vinegar trick? If you have...odors... still, try spraying it down with diluted vinegar. It worked for me once. It smelled like vinegar for about 2 hours, but afterwards the smell was gone. Good Luck!